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When There Are Not Enough Rocks July 11, 2006

Posted by Andy in andy roth, Grammar, improvement, soapbox.

(from ~1996)

I begin this installment of SoapBox without a clue as to what it will be. Read on, and discover with me what the subject will turn out to be. Perhaps this would be a good time to reflect on a quote by Forrest Gump: “Sometimes there just aren’t enough rocks.” To refresh your memory, he said that when he was talking about how Jenny was throwing rocks at the small house that she had spent a very unhappy childhood in. Here are some other times when there are just not enough rocks:

  • When someone feels the need to drive below the posted speed limit in the left most lane.
  • When the person in front of you at the grocery store pays by check.
  • When the weatherman is wrong.
  • When people misuse the word “literally” (i.e. It was literally raining cats and dogs.)
  • Actually, when anyone pays by check.
  • When people get overly concerned with wind chill.
  • When people confuse Macintoshes with computers.
  • When someone calls you by mistake then does not believe you when you tell them they have the wrong number.
  • When they interrupt a TV show to warn to you that it may go below freezing (this only happens in the south)
  • When the Coke machine does not like your dollar.


1. MorningGlory - July 12, 2006

Let us not forget:

When someone puts their used chewing gum in the ashtray.

When the doctor makes you sit in the exam room for 45 minutes past your appointment in one of those paper gowns.

When there’s a cop driving exactly the speed limit at rush hour, and nobody will pass him.

Nice blog. Keep ’em coming.


2. Kelly Drahzal - October 6, 2006

public radio beg-a-thons…
child-proof caps that no one can open…
brussels sprouts….
the million straight pins in a brand new folded shirt…

3. nosugrefneb - October 6, 2006

When there’s a cop going 20 over and talking on a cell phone.

When there’s a wall of people taking up an entire sidewalk as if they have nowhere to be…ever.

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